What, When & Why

This site was born on September 8, 1999.  Originally I simply wanted free Web space where I could store files of pictures. This way, I could post them on sites like TheForce.net (yeah, I know - a geek I am) without committing the unforgivable sin of stealing bandwidth from other sites.

I decided to put some personal information on my site, just for the heck of it, and to see if I could do it at all.  I knew next to nothing about HTML, so I created a very simple site using Netscape Composer.  Once I saw my own, working site on the Web, I was filled with a sense of, "Holy crap!  That's cool!"  After that incredibly profound moment, I was hooked.

I wanted to get some ideas on what else I could put on my site, so I looked at some personal sites I found by searching through Webring.org.  I discovered that some of the creators kept online journals, and was astonished to see how many of them there are.  I found myself drawn to a number of them, the eloquence of the writing making it seem as if I could hear the author's voice in my head.

I decided I wanted to give the online journal thing a try.  Having kept a paper journal on and off since I was about 11, the process isn't exactly new to me. But there is one big difference, being, of course, that I now potentially have an audience reading about my life.  Unfortunately, I told a few people I know in real life about this site before I decided to start a journal, so if their names are mentioned here, they can read about it.  I'm not one of those people who can just use the disclaimer, "If I know you in real life, don't read this, or read at your own risk."  I want to be as honest as possible, but I draw a line when it comes to hurting the feelings of someone I care about.

Therefore, I use pseudonyms for most of the people I talk about in the journal.  This is mostly for my own comfort.  If people I know read it, they will certainly recognize themselves and possibly others before long, with or without the pseudonyms.  People I don't know who read it won't care one way or the other.  Nevertheless, I feel better using a psuedonym unless I have the owner's permission to use their real name.

As for the reasons why I've decided put my life and thoughts on public display, I guess it's something of a release, because the act is so unlike who I am in real life.  I have such a quiet voice, I don't like to speak up or speak out, and I've never been very good at expressing myself verbally.  I needed to express myself somehow, and the only way I could do it was through my diary.  However, it is sometimes unsatisfying to write things knowing that no one would ever read them, and I began to wonder if anyone would ever really know me at all.  It gives me a strange sense of pleasure to think that maybe, somewhere, someone is reading my thoughts and getting to know a part of me that doesn't always escape the confines of my own cranium.

I'm not a prolific writer; I usually update only once or twice a week.  I also don't pretend to be a particularly good writer, nor do I have any ambitions for writing beyond this journal.  I'm still not sure if this is a project I'll want to continue for the long term.  But I'll try it for awhile, and see how I like it.
 

What's in a Name?

I was trying to think of a name for this site, and tried to get ideas from the lyrics of various songs I really like.  I first thought of using "These Pristine Velvet Walls," a phrase from Sarah McLachlan's "Vox."  I loved the sound of it, but I was afraid that using it would be considered copyright violation.  Then my thoughts turned to Blue Rodeo and their song "Rose-Coloured Glasses" and realized I could use that title, since it is a common phrase and wasn't invented by the band.

She sees the world through rose-coloured glasses
Painted skies and graceful romances
I see a world that's tired and scared of living on the edge too long
Where does she get off telling me that love could save us all
Save us all

-- Blue Rodeo, "Rose-Coloured Glasses"

I don't think the title is necessarily a reflection of my general outlook on life, although to some extent I think we all see the world through rose-coloured glasses.  We have our own belief systems, and that effects the way we view the world and the events surrounding us.  I know I can be accused, once in a while, of only seeing what I want to see, or of seeing only the beauty in things, while trying to ignore anything that contradicts my views.  For the most part, though, I try to see things from more than one angle, even the depressing ones.  That's probably one of the reasons why I rarely have a strong opinion on anything.

In any case, I happen to be an optician (I dispense eyeglasses for a living), so I think there's a nice little tie-in right there.